2019 The New Me

Back again: it's been a couple of years and I'm ready to start a new phase of my life. My house remodel is just about finished: I made a bad design decision regarding a soapstone counter and farmhouse sink. I love the configuration but if I wasn't so cheap I would have hired a pro and I'm sure would have been discouraged from the decisions I made. Here's the deal: I wanted a huge farmhouse sink and since it was going to be fabricated by my stone 'guy' I could dictate the size. My guy had never worked with soapstone and, of course I hadn't either, so he made the sink as big as he could considering the custom cabinetry. It turns out that it is so big and deep that I can't have a garbage disposal. Also, the size dictated it being set about 4 inches from the edge of the counter and since it is so deep/wide/long, I actually cannot touch the back corner/windows which are above the sink area. Also, due to my choices and a little decision made by my cabinetmaker, I ended up with a under sink cabinet door which is too narrow for a plumber to fit into for any kind of work, including installation of my dishwasher. So, for the past year I've tried to decide if I can live with the results of my decisions. I decided that I could not, called my cabinet guy and asked for a price for demolition of corner cabinets, removal of soapstone and construction/installation of new cabinetry with corner sink of standard manufacturers dimensions. I explained that this was definitely my error and I wanted him to do the demo and remake because I'm hoping he doesn't have to use a sledge hammer to remove the beautiful custom cabinets which he fabricated and installed. I'll use them in the garage, if possible. Also, I understand that my soapstone is a lost cause. I'll be thrilled to death if I can salvage enough to use in the garage but I can't worry about it. I made my annual pilgrimage to the Ojai Music Festival Holiday House Tour in December and visited two EXTREMELY UPSCALE contemporary houses which each had zinc kitchen counters so, I'm going to have zinc tops installed over 3/4" plywood. I talked to my carpenter/remodeling king/silversmith and all around guru about zinc tops and he'll do them for me. With all of this, I'm still going to be under the estimate for a custom kitchen, simply because the cabinetmaker is so REA$ONABLE. And a very nice guy.
I'm loving my little house, which was my rent house for years. This is the one I bought when the real estate market tanked in the 'oughts'. I never lived in the house, did a quick and dirty remodel and rented it. It stayed rented until after my husband died and I needed to move into it myself. I no longer have a 3 car garage and a huge storage area, which hurts, and I miss the huge family room with wet bar and pool table (a fabulous buffet table/craft table/space for fabric and pattern layouts while sewing), but I don't miss the swimming pool nor the rodent problem from being on the edge of nowhere. I really do miss my neighbors, however. And the view of the Channel Islands...... And, of course, my dear old man.
BUT, life is good. I'm volunteering with Ventura County Long Term Care Services as a State Certified Ombudsman. I'm assigned to two skilled nursing facilities and three residential care facilities for the aged. The RCFE are also known as board and care homes. Mine are each populated by six developmentally disabled adults and they are wonderful. The homes are owned and operated by a woman who was a psych tech at Camarillo State Hospital and she hires the most wonderful staff. The homes are impeccably clean, the residents are happy, clad in fresh, clean clothing and well groomed. They attend adult day care Monday through Friday which I visit, as well. I'm so happy to have this assignment.
My skilled nursing facilities are great for the most part, also. I visit one large facility of about 175 residents and one smaller one of about 70 residents. The larger SNF is about a half mile from my house and is an upscale facility although there are many MediCal (California version of MediCaid) residents. My smaller facility is about 8 miles from my house and has lots of MediCal residents. I have a very large family and some of my relatives are MediCaid recipients. I can see the faces of my relatives in those elderly and infirm, whether MediCal or private. Also, some of the residents are younger than I am and have similar back/health problems... visiting them is incentive for sticking with the exercise and diet regime! I visit the SNF once a week and the RCFE once a month but since I don't have grandchildren, I'm a widow and my own Mom, age 97 TODAY, has a live in carer, I have time to spend in my facilities and I usually visit them more than once a week/month.
I'm also very aware of issues regarding dementia patients because of my years caring for my husband and watching my Mom with my step-father. I was lucky to have full time assistance but I spent a lot of time dealing with 'Sundowners' as well as the other issues of aging and illness.
If you haven't done it already, immediately invest in long term care insurance. I bought my policy when I was 48 or 49, I think. It will cover my expenses for 10 years and based on my family history, that's probably more than I need but most of my relatives didn't drink, smoke, or live in SoCal. Keeping fingers crossed that I didn't do too much damage.
Back to the nursing home for a minute: if you have a loved one in a facility the best thing you can do is visit and listen. The Ombudsman program is a federal program created during Nixon's term as POTUS (who knew?). Every county in every state is mandated to have ombudsmen but no federal or state funding is provided. If you suspect there are problems in the facility you visit, try to find the ombudsman (it should be searchable using Long Term Care Services or (name of state) Ombudsman. Also, there are survey results on line which you should be able to access. Talk to the Director of Nursing and the Activities Director. Talk to the Administrator. Don't make life miserable for your loved one but that person has a right to respect and appropriate care. Scrutinize the medication.
Lots of info on line. You can look at the CANHR website (advocates in California) for information about lots of hot button topics.
I'm sitting in bed typing instead of taking care of business so I'll sign off for now. I hate to say it but I am now dog-less. My boy, Archie, The Wonder Dog, joined his cohorts, Sugar (the original Frustrated Cockapoo) and Gloria (my true angel mutt and personal assistant) by crossing the Rainbow Bridge early in 2018. He was a dog of deep thoughts and unending loyalty. Not a brilliant canine but a wonderful companion.
So now I am truly alone in my little house and it is perfect.
tatafornow